Listening to the Message of Emotions

Listening to the Message of Emotions

“Trust in him at all times, my people; pour out your hearts before him. God is our refuge!”
—Psalm 62:8 (DHH)

Emotions are part of a leader’s whole life and, when they are recognized, examined in the light of the Word, and brought before God, they can reveal needs, wounds, and tensions that require attention.

Meditation

Pastors and leaders do not cease to experience fear, sadness, anger, joy, frustration, or anxiety as they take on spiritual responsibilities. Emotions are part of our humanity and can communicate important information about what is happening within us.

Ignoring them does not make them disappear; often, it allows them to quietly influence decisions, relationships, and the way authority is exercised. Peter Scazzero states, “We cannot change what we do not know.” Therefore, honestly recognizing what we feel is an important step toward maturity.

David modeled this transparency by pouring out his heart before God. Jesus, in turn, expressed sadness, compassion, indignation, and anguish without allowing those emotions to turn him away from the Father’s will. Gary R. Collins notes, “Emotions are part of God’s creation.”

However, listening to them does not mean making them an absolute authority. They must be interpreted through Scripture, prayer, discernment, and, when necessary, the support of mature people. Fear may warn of vulnerability; anger, of violated boundaries; and sadness, of a loss that needs to be processed.

An emotionally mature leader neither suppresses nor idolizes feelings: he recognizes them, examines them, and submits them to God. In this way, he avoids reacting from hidden wounds and learns to respond with wisdom, self-control, and grace.

Reflection Questions

1. What emotion has appeared most frequently in my life during the past few weeks, and what might it be communicating to me?

   I should identify it without judging myself, explore what situation triggers it, and ask what need, loss, fear, expectation, or wound it may be revealing, so that I may honestly bring it before God in prayer.

2. How might the emotions I have not processed be influencing my leadership and relationships today?

   They may be expressed through irritability, impulsiveness, isolation, harshness, excessive control, or defensive decisions. In this way, I may respond from my wounds and fears instead of from discernment, grace, and self-control.

3. How can I learn to listen to my emotions without allowing them to govern my decisions?

   I can name them, examine them through the Word, pray about their causes, wait before reacting, speak with mature people, and make decisions after integrating emotion, biblical truth, wisdom, and discernment.

Prayer

Lord, help me honestly recognize what is happening within me. Give me wisdom to understand my emotions without being governed by them. Heal my wounds, order my affections, and allow your Spirit to guide my responses, decisions, and relationships. Amen.